Saturday, May 20, 2017

Bird Brain Battles


The bird’s back! My son had one where he was working.

            The bird I speak of is a Robin; my son’s was a Cardinal. These deranged creatures think there is another male in the window wanting to horn in on his territory; and the “two” are literally butting heads.

            Day after day he battles himself, afraid he’s going to lose his grip on all he surveys to himself. Week after week he mounts the same attack strategy, hit em head on; hour after hour he hits his opponent with dead on accuracy; sometimes with such force that he tumbles onto the roof a little dazed. But then he gets up and starts all over again. Nothing makes the saying “Bird Brain” more alive than a living example.
            If you have, or have had, this problem you only have two solutions. The nicest one is to cover the window so it doesn’t reflect anymore. My son tried this and the dumb bird just started banging away at another window; so he covered that one……and the bird went to attaching himself at another window……and so on it went. You can keep covering up the windows, but soon your place will start looking like “that place”, you know, that one house in the neighborhood that looks to be abandoned, or at the very least unsociable. You can put a sign out front explaining that you have a “bird problem”, but I wouldn’t look for any invites to the block party anytime soon; you have become “that place” with “those people”.
            The second solution is a pellet gun. Yep, there, I said it, a pellet gun. Hate me if you must, but this creature will not give up until his nemeses is dead or gone. Well he’s not going to go anytime soon so I might have to come to his aid and help him in his cause and defeat his foe for him.

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